Elegy
Tag: Video
Happy!
On Becoming A Star
Things are blowing up in my life right now. I am dealing with situations, I cannot even believe people are behaving this way or I am going through what I am going through.
All software continues to misbehave, literally doesn’t matter what the source is or who wrote the code.
I went to the Lord and said I am in such a major jam. I have friends but they are far off, human, struggling with their own problems yet trying to help me too.
I love them all dearly. They are but flesh, like me. Imperfect, limited, prone to failure and error. Like me. Like all of us. Everyone the same.
I feel like a very small mudspeck in a very very large vast universe. A mere blade of grass who has taken on the stars themselves.
Who am I, the single blade of grass a regular lawnmower can destroy tomorrow in an instant, to proclaim lofty things? To talk about constellations?
I said I got into this massive jam following You, Lord. It seems like all forces are conspiring against me. Many ARE, very factually and provably, with real life evidence they are doing so.
I said here I am proclaiming Jesus Christ is the Way, Truth and Life, He is the answer. And yet my own life is massively going to pieces. Why Lord? What is happening?
I praised Him; I surrendered to Him as usual. But I also said, You say You are Love and You love me. This doesn’t look like Love to me!
I don’t feel loved. How can everything be literally blowing up and almost all forces against me, how is this Love????
He says:
Seren, follow My original instructions for this post and write about nukes.
OK Lord Amen.
A Little Background About Nukes
This, first of all, isn’t a commentary about the wisdom or morality of the nuclear arms race other than it factually happened. The Lord doesn’t want me focusing on that issue.
I was personally involved with the nuclear arms race and also knew others who were. I once worked at a nuclear weapons plant. In addition to people I met there, met others along the way who had been in that program.
I literally never had access to classified information. That plant is now a really giant pile of dirt, all roads into it destroyed. I could tell you work anecdotes and what it was like to be onsite. I don’t know anything classified.
I did admin work. I built and ran a database of OSHA incidents and made pretty graphs. Held some other positions. Nothing earthshattering.
I had the minimum clearance necessary to be onsite and nothing else. They were beyond super paranoid about guarding secrets; I didn’t therefore know any.
But it was an incredible experience. It brought me very close to, and in the middle of, the arms race and the aftermath. I therefore developed a lifelong fascination with the processes of nuclear fission and fusion.
Obviously how to build bombs is EXTREMELY restricted info, so I studied nuclear power plants instead.
Chernobyl
This is probably the most infamous nuclear power plant meltdown. The ultimate causes of it were faulty design and human error. People are still visiting the nearby town of Pripyat, which had to be evacuated.
Probably the best, most accurate summary of what happened is here. A far more descriptive summary is here.
The Cliff Notes summary is they misjudged how to adjust the control rods in the nuclear pile due to operator error, and therefore parts of the pile were ejected out of the building into the outside air, which is BAD.
How It Works
Here is a super easy to understand video about control rods and what they do in a nuclear power plant. They are called that because they literally control the nuclear reactions happening in the pile, or core.
The nuclear pile is just another name for the reactor core, which is the mass of uranium or plutonium undergoing fission. This link is a great explanation of how it all works.
Modern nuclear power plants all work off the principle of fission. In many nuclear bombs, there is an additional fusion reaction. They are designed to explode and the additional fusion component greatly multiplies the destructive effect.
Here is a great video explaining fission.
The mechanics involved in actually doing all this are obviously closely guarded secrets, as well as access to nuclear fuels. But these are the principles on which all these things operate.
Hiroshima and Nagasaki
So in World War II, America dropped nuclear bombs on the Japanese cities Hiroshima and Nagasaki. It was devastating and the war ended not long after.
This is why nukes were researched and developed in the first place. It was then discovered you could build power plants using these reactions. Mankind, however, sought nuclear power in the very beginning to harness it for destruction.
Thanks For The Science And History Lesson, Seren. What Is Your Point?
I drew the following conclusions from this info.
- Nuclear reactions, natural or artificial, have one purpose: releasing epic amounts of POWER and ENERGY.
- This can be used CONSTRUCTIVELY or DESTRUCTIVELY.
- Fission involves BOMBARDMENT of an atom to make it SHATTER, releasing ENERGY.
- Fusion involves the BONDING of atoms in a way that OVERCOMES NATURAL FORCES, releasing INCREDIBLE POWER.
- Once you start a reaction, there are CHAIN REACTIONS affecting other atoms. This releases MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF POWER AND ENERGY.
This whole post was inspired by something a dear sister in the Lord sent, about how incredible atomic power is released first and foremost by fission. Fusion comes later as a byproduct of fission.
Fission, meaning, the atom is bombarded with neutrons until it can no longer take this and literally shatters. Releasing epic energy and power.
Oh.
So in my life, I am being bombarded. I won’t go into all the sources as do not need to share the drama. Real life stuff, provable stuff, why are people acting this way? Major medical issues, have paperwork to prove it.
The point isn’t to succeed.
The point is to literally BECOME A STAR.
Christ Alone Is Life
“I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat is planted in the soil and dies, it remains alone. But its death will produce many new kernels–a plentiful harvest of new lives.” ~ John 12:24, NLT.
I have been having convos about the condition of my physical body outside of what I discuss here. The conclusion I have reached is what ultimately happens with that is irrelevant.
Life isn’t the life of my physical body WHICH WILL END. This is why I am ranting against faith healing. Not that I don’t believe in it. I have a whole post stating I am alive miraculously RIGHT NOW!
I object because of the kneejerk assumption the Lord ALWAYS heals; no Christians ever die when CLEARLY they do, and how this invalidation of my real major illnesses makes me feel.
Life is Jesus Christ. Period. To live is Christ; to die is gain.
We are strangers and sojourners on Planet Earth. We get involved with all the crap here and forget Home is elsewhere.
Jesus does love me. He loves me so insanely much He is bombarding me in order to bring about FISSION. Using the passing things of Earth to bring about ETERNAL LIFE.
What is eternal life? It is Him!
And when fission occurs, there will be a chain reaction. Others will be affected; there will be fission in them. They will affect yet others. And so on.
Unleashing The Life Of Christ
What is the point of nuclear reactions? To unleash devastating amounts of POWER and ENERGY. In this case, that power and energy are the Lord’s and SOLELY under His control.
This is not a recipe to wield immense power. Satan thought that was a good idea, to try to usurp the power of God. He is a lot smarter than you.
This worked out very badly for him; he didn’t succeed, despite claiming he did. Others have tried and God smacked them down.
This, I believe, is LIVING UNION with Christ where He is in control. His life, His thoughts, His actions. Life and Love. Jesus the Source, the Creator in Whom dwells all the fullness of God.
“I pray not on behalf of these only, but also for those who believe in Me through their message, that they all may be one. Just as You, Father, are in Me and I am in You, so also may they be one in Us, so the world may believe that You sent Me. The glory that You have given to Me I have given to them, that they may be one just as We are one—I in them and You in Me—that they may be perfected in unity, so that the world may know that You sent Me and loved them as You loved Me.
“Father, I also want those You have given Me to be with Me where I am, so that they may see My glory—the glory You gave Me, for You loved Me before the foundation of the world. Righteous Father, the world did not know You, but I knew You; and these knew that You sent Me. I made your Name known to them, and will continue to make it known, so that the love with which You loved Me may be in them, and I in them.” ~ John 17:20-26, Tree of Life Version.
By definition, only the Lord can accomplish this. My part is simply cooperating with or resisting His grace. This is a God thing from start to finish.
Conclusion
“For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we suffer. Our hope for you is unshaken, for we know that as you share in our sufferings, you will also share in our comfort.
“For we do not want you to be unaware, brothers, of the affliction we experienced in Asia. For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead. He delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will deliver us again. You also must help us by prayer, so that many will give thanks on our behalf for the blessing granted us through the prayers of many.” ~ 2 Corinthians 1:5-11, ESV.
Amen and amen. All praise, glory and honor be to the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit forever and ever. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
By My Side (Music Video)
I have been a big Godspell fan from childhood on. This song represents me in ways I myself don’t get.
Would that we all loved Jesus like they do in this video. ❤
Seren Needs To Stop Wishing To Die
A lot can happen in 24 hours.
Judging Former Friends
I wrote the last post and this honestly killed me. I am sure the people it was about, I am Number 1 on their personal bad list now, but I was directed to do all I did. I didn’t want to post it, was more than happy to be wrong if it was wrong, asked the Lord do I need to take it down, did NOT want to write those words.
I wish what I could post is some kind of profuse apology and delete the post; I understand we can’t be friends now but an apology.
I simply cannot. It is true, and then I got to see what happened. Made to see, more like it, as I didn’t want to watch.
The Lord pointed out, this distresses you; you are sad, you never wanted this. This means you are not vengeful, so what you wrote isn’t you pronouncing a curse.
If I had been egging Him on, yeah you go Lord, then I would have also drawn judgment on myself. This is not the type of thing the Lord takes delight in. In this case, He gave these people literal months to realize what the truth was and what He wanted.
They like so many chose what they wanted. I got to see the sad, terrible, horrifying results with future implications.
The Lord Answers Prayer According To HIS Will
Prayers to the Lord intended to break my words were used by Him to fulfill them instead.
Prayer isn’t magick; God listens or not. And then does as He wishes. Any harm wished on me fell on those people five times what was wished for me.
I am revealing this as even now He wishes to be merciful. And warn about the consequences of proceeding along current lines.
But why did He make me watch? To show me you are never too big to fall. You can appear successful great walk important inspiring. You can be truly anointed and used by Him.
And still fall badly and do stuff that then has serious and lasting consequences.
To show me, although my life will be relatively brief, He has zero issues judging me also if I seriously stray. That I will surely go down myself if at any point in time I choose my will over His.
He didn’t take pleasure in any of it. Neither did I. Awful sad day.
Seren Loses Her Temper
I proved how human I was by then failing. Ranted a little on Facebook and just lost it on a friends group. Lost my temper and never do.
I have been going through so much anyway; I was so emotional and sad. A friend took my call. She understands world ending anger like mine. Mine is a product of 50 years of abuse from many and not much can be done to remove it.
She understands when I get going, I will pull metaphorical explosives out of my metaphorical closet, and metaphorically burn someone’s house down, enjoy the flames and fireworks. Be sorry later but no problems at the time.
I have a powerful will and have terrified people with it. My friend just said, try not to burn any bridges.
She listened to me and helped me calm down. I later apologized to friend group. All was well as they are real friends. Those people are very very dear and so grateful for all of them. ❤
Fire Falls, Consumes Everything
Then took a nap. I lay there and gave all to the Lord. Three times. The first time I saw fire. I felt weird and odd and scared. What is going on?
Repeated consecration to the Lord twice more. He said stop there, three is a sacred number. You have conclusively demonstrated will and intent.
It was pretty clear powerful forces were operating on me. Saw more fire. Praise the Lord had praise and worship music going. Still felt weird and odd and scared, what is happening to me??
Experience grew more intense. I reacted to my panic by seeking the Lord more deeply. I confessed, forgave, begged the Lord to remove anything between us. Asked Him to fill me with His Love, peace, grace and Holy Spirit. Nothing more important than being right with You, Lord.
Towards the end I lay there knowing real, powerful stuff was happening, not sure what was going on, was this it? Was I going to die? Why not at peace? Why am I scared?
I felt more empty inside as stuff was removed. I responded by focusing more intensely on Jesus as the only reality.
A praise song came on and I decided that, regardless of what the Lord thought, I was going to go out praising Him if indeed I was going out. I joined my will and heart to the song, and just praised the Lord.
And then the breakthrough came. Incredible clean joy and peace. Bubbling over happiness. A sense that I had been utterly transformed, that the fire had consumed and cleansed me.
The forces lifted. The Lord told me to call my brother and tell him what happened.
He knew what happened without me telling him. He took a nap at the same time, and had a vision of himself in the throne room of the Lord.
Among whatever else he discussed in this audience with God, he had questions about me.
He wanted to know if the Lord was indeed behind the blog, and the Lord replied yes, He was.
But He had an important word of correction for me. His literal words are the title of this post.
Seren needs to stop wishing to die.
The Lord communicated that, despite me being otherwise right with Him, if I didn’t repent, when I died I would not end up in His presence.
That SERIOUSLY got my attention. Michael said the Lord wasn’t mad at me at all, but I need to fix this.
Death Wish
To clarify, my best understanding is that the Lord ISN’T upset with me reporting the medical situation or even what I think the likely results are. He hasn’t contradicted anything He Himself said either.
What He utterly stomped on is all the talk about dying. That Christ is my life; speak about that. My body will eventually die; yours will too. It is irrelevant.
Christ is my life regardless of the condition of my body. I need to talk about being alive in Christ and not speak death over myself by constantly talking about dying.
Dead Bodies Are Great In CSI
My body will ultimately end up vacated and bug food regardless of what I do or don’t do, however long that is. Yours too. Death happens to literally everyone.
Jesus died, even. He didn’t reuse His body, as it was destroyed. It was buried with respect and lay inert in a grave.
When He rose, He came back in an obviously regenerated body with frankly supernatural abilities.
Your Body Isn’t You
I have like just about everyone been to funerals. Have NEVER liked viewing the body of the deceased.
The last one I was at, I looked at the body and rejected it as being my dear beloved friend. It looked like a horrible cold pale bad imitation of him.
I saw my friend in the stuff they gathered for his Celebration of Life. He lived on truly in the objects and photos that represented his spirit.
Dead bodies need to be treated with the respect due the person whose bodies they were, but they are ultimately a waste product.
They are not in any way that person.
When You Speak Death Over Yourself, However, It Impacts Your Body
I found this on Facebook as a memory. Think it is a great example of the results of speaking death over yourself.
I honestly believe my body is in the condition it is because of all the death I and others spoke over it.
All the abuse, unkindness, neglect of any kind cursed it. 50 years of that is why I have issues more commonly seen in the elderly.
Due to abuse, developed a death wish.
But then I voluntarily reinforced it. Three suicide attempts, many many hospitalizations, things I will not discuss.
In the last five years body started majorly hitting the skids and cropped up with tons of health issues.
My friend was talking about it all. Seems like you were always dying of something, she said. Why couldn’t you just live? It was stressful.
I am reporting what she said as she nailed it.
Decision after decision whole life focused on how can I end it? How do I die soonest and blow this popsicle joint?
Fulfilling A Death Wish Is Suicide
It is THIS the Lord is saying REPENT of. I am not gonna be your executioner, Seren. I will not sign off on and approve of your suicide by whatever means.
If you persist in speaking death over yourself and focusing on it, and thereby bring it about yourself, that IS a form of suicide. So you will not end up with Me in that circumstance.
Christ My Life
Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in Me, though he may die, he shall live. And whoever lives and believes in Me shall never die. Do you believe this?” ~ John 11:25-26, NKJV.
A Moral Life Will Not Save You
An ex Satanist once told me about a subsect of Satanism in which adherents are instructed to live very moral lives.
The purpose is to make Christians look bad. I am serious. The world is supposed to look at Christians getting drunk and laid Saturday night and showing up to church hungover, then compare with the sect members living apparently good lives.
The world is a lot more likely to follow the people living the apparently good, moral lives and reject the hypocritical Christians. So they then get interested in Satanism. The trap shuts.
An acquaintance was talking about a major TV psychic and unable to comprehend how he could be doing the Enemy’s work. He was so nice, she said over and over.
Christian Doing, Christian Busyness
If someone does escape the Enemy’s clutches and ends up in the sheepfold, all is not lost. Still plenty of ways to bring them down, in the Enemy’s thinking.
The Gifts Of The Spirit
I am not talking about Galatians 5:22-23, which refers to the FRUITS of the Spirit. Fruit takes time to grow.
I am talking spiritual manifestations which happen regularly in certain churches. Faith healing, being “slain in the Spirit”, casting out demons, prophecy, etc. are common examples.
These are real valid things the Spirit of the Lord does. They can also many times be counterfeited by the Enemy, so caution and discernment are needed if you participate in any of this.
Churches do go completely off the rails over emphasizing spiritual manifestations in their services and practices. Bethel Church in Redding CA teaches, among other things, it is ALWAYS God’s Will to heal, and recommends lying on graves to “get that person’s anointing” in a practice they call “gravesucking“.
This is MASSIVELY OCCULT. Don’t do this yourself!
Another famous example is Benny Hinn, who raked in millions and lived a famously lavish lifestyle promoting faith healing and the prosperity gospel. Even he is recanting to some degree; perhaps the IRS raid on his offices was persuasive in this?
Bible Knowledge Can Be A Trap
It is good and utterly necessary to read, study and memorize the Word. It is key for a healthy Christian life. Most people don’t read the Word ENOUGH.
There is, however, the ivory tower trap. There are Christians who learn so much it feeds their egos and they operate from there. If someone is excessively into correct translations, Greek, Hebrew, and arguing theology, they probably are in an ivory tower and not anywhere near Christ.
Which is the whole point.
The Do Gooder
In general, we need LOTS more people doing good. People are happy binging Netflix, playing video games, go to work come home leave me alone.
But to someone who subconsciously assumes good works will save them, you can end up with a faithful churchgoer doing lots of volunteer work and helping people.
The difference between the do gooder and the faithful believer is the do gooder generally has a secret life at odds with their public one. Since they are doing good deeds out of self will, the self will express itself in bad behavior somehow.
I am thinking of people with really bad home lives, secret abusers, people involved in all kinds of immoral and sometimes illegal behavior. When their sins come to light, many fall.
This is so common most people just assume Christians are all hypocrites. They then look elsewhere for spiritual nourishment. This is an Enemy win.
I Am Depressed Reading This. Who Can Be Saved?
Basically what all that has in common is everyone in the above categories is operating out of self will. As long as you operate out of self, results will be the same whether your deeds are seemingly good or apparently bad.
You will live a difficult life and end up perishing eternally. This is the only possible end of a life lived in self will.
Yeah that is TERRIBLE. God thought so too.
So He sent His Son Jesus Christ to pay the price of your sins so you could be with Him forever.
Just accept Jesus, let Him run you and your life, and peace, happiness and eternal life are yours.
The key is Christ life. The key is Christ living in you, living His life through you. Christ is Life and its Source. He is the only Savior. Everything else is death.
I have more to say but think need to continue in another post.
If you want Jesus Christ to be your life, live His life through you, please pray with me:
Heavenly Father, I thank You for Your salvation in Your Son, Jesus Christ, Who is fully God and fully human. I believe He came in the flesh, died for my sins, was buried, and rose again on the third day. I now accept Him as my personal Lord and Savior. I praise You for this wonderful gift! In Jesus’ Name Amen.
Poem For The Dying
I called my brother this morning. He had been on my heart, my spirit was grieved and worried.
This man is not my legal relative. He is nonetheless the only true brother I have ever had, and dear beyond words to me.
We talked about so many things as usual. Mostly about Jesus, our favorite subject.
And he helped me understand a situation in my life which perplexed me. He helped me understand why I am being shunned by people who should love me.
So here, for them, a poem.
You say you are there
For the broken.
There to help
The lost.
You are actually there
For the broken YOU choose.
The lost YOU choose.
I have shown you
The truth.
Demonstrated the reality
With my own life.
In the end, you chose
What you wanted.
You chose the mission
Without question.
Therefore, hear your fate.
You will indeed be stuck
With your choices.
Share in the consequences
Of those you chose to help.
You will be fated together,
Rise or fall together.
You have chosen this boat
And do not understand water.
So in this boat you will stay
With all those in it.
And if it is indeed the Titanic,
Go down with it too.
You may want to invest
In lifeboats and signal flares.
You may consider
Swimming lessons.
Beware of icebergs.
Have a nice trip.
Once And For All (Music Video)
Who Is Behind This Blog?
Dear Lord Jesus, so completely alone.
Whoever else reads this, this is my letter to You.
So it is late. Super late. I went on a counseling site where it is a group chat. Everyone helps everyone, it is peer support.
You gave me keen and laser insight to a situation. I saw it all clearly and explained it simply. That person has good direction now on what they need to do next. Thank You Lord.
I popped up with more and more and they were all saying how wise I was. All problems seemed simple, solutions clear and obvious.
I ran through each situation, followed behavior patterns, drew correct conclusions swiftly.
I responded and thought, this isn’t me. How do I see so much, know so much, why is everything breathtakingly obvious to me?
It is because of Your wisdom, Your knowledge, Your Spirit Lord. I was aware my mind was working on far beyond any level I would consider normal.
I just got upset, said what if this is all wrong? You brought to mind all the real life evidence of why this is right and I am indeed walking with You.
Just, talking to all those people knew what next right thing to say was. Could see the truth so clearly in every situation.
My concern, Lord, is I want to KNOW You are using me. That it is Your Spirit speaking through me. That I am not myself deceived and perpetrating deception unknowingly.
I know only You reveal truth. You are unknowable unless You reveal Yourself. Your Word says so. You hide Yourself and none can find You.
Unless You wish to be found, You are unfindable.
I need to know, Jesus. I need to know if my medical conditions will result in death. I need to know if I am proclaiming Your Truth, or this blog is a dangerous exercise in futility.
Whatever others think or say, I need to know. Because nothing is more important than being right with You.
If this is wrong, blog goes away. I don’t know what to say but as being wrong means I continue to live, think this will be forgiven.
I completely and totally humble myself before You, prepared to accept and act on Your Truth whatever it may be. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
He says:
Very good, I told you My answer yesterday. Please link for the readers, thank you.
This IS My answer; it is very clear and direct. Your question is really: are you hearing from Me or the Enemy?
Yes, Lord. That is my question.
In reply, the Lord sent me to Ezekiel 21. Huh, I thought, what is in Ezekiel 21?
This!
Wow! I uploaded this artwork TWO YEARS AGO!!
I didn’t understand any of it other than somehow I was that sword. Not in a literal sense. The sword reference in Ezekiel literally referred to Babylon, and how they destroyed Jerusalem and the temple.
I have never had pride so badly, praise the Lord, I thought I was some weird reincarnation of an ancient civilization or anything crazy like that.
Clearly the Lord meant something else by it. I really didn’t know. Sword references crop up again and again in my art and poetry ever after.
So tonight I say, Lord how do I know it is You? His reply is:
You’re My sword! Have been telling you this for years.
In fact, here is this art you made of it two years ago. So I have been telling you this for awhile!
Seren, can unravel complexities of others’ lives with greatest of ease thanks to Divine Wisdom. Not getting it when comes to her own life.
He is patient, says also:
Many others need to know the answer to your question, so I am answering everyone at once.
So I went back through my poetry which has been accumulating for literal years. Found this one, among many CLEARLY detailing the path I was on.
The Canary Died
so I ask again
are you brave
if you don’t feel brave
if every day is a struggle
if every day you’d rather die
than keep staggering along
burdens crushing and overwhelming
and yet
you keep on
you put one foot in front of the other
after awhile you stop asking questions
the pain so bad you can’t breathe
after awhile, all pain
to lose your resolve
to wonder why you’re fighting
is it worth it?
who will this help?
is my suffering meaningless?
knowing
always knowing
the path is just going
to get darker
the track leads
deeper into the mine
the canary died.
there is no way back now
forward to face
certain death.
so as I struggle along
I ask
why fight?
If I am going to lose anyway,
why fight?
once upon a time
I had a dream
and in it, the Lord said
this person and this person
and this other person
you helped them
you went through this
so they didn’t have to.
you distracted the enemy
from hurting others
your suffering is precious
and I have collected every tear.
Thank You, Lord,
after all,
soldiers die
I am nothing if not a soldier
fighting enemies unseen.
the canary died
so I will die,
but
my death deep in the mine
is not for nothing
it will break open
many things.Seren Wild © July 31, 2017.
The Lord said:
Stop. Tell the world how the Enemy is interfering with the search for the truth.
Tell them about clicking on poetry links on DA that don’t open. Or open to another deviation. Mine or someone else’s.
Tell them about the poem you tried to access that scrolled non-stop in the preview rather than opening. When there is no code allowing that behavior.
Tell them about the one you couldn’t open at all, it wouldn’t open or led somewhere else.
Do mention how you try to copy/paste links and it doesn’t work. That you have resorted to backup backup methods, as normal methods regularly fail.
Say how programs on your phone have unexplained random failures for no reason. When you were trying to create an important art piece, the program refused to function.
Please continue.
So went forward and now no issues opening links or odd misbehaviors, thank You Jesus.
Go on through life getting darker and more horrible and then this.
Purpose Anew
she lifting
all lay aborning
tucked quiet beneath
blankets
mind stilled
head spinny
and pondered.
Oh yes, like her
mother, Mary
(Mother of the Word),
she pondered.
Two gates closed
and the third, about to fall.
Youth and going back
are not options.
Truth will be determined,
here and now.
You choose your options:
they are few.
OK, she said,
here I am.
She presented herself to the King.
Master, what would
You have me do?
There was silence.
Only a cello could be heard.
So she said, once again,
Master, what would
You have me do?
And her beloveds said,
you must choose.
He will not tell you.
And then the music rose,
and she realized
her sword lay idle
her shield unburnished
her armor lacked care.
She realized it was
her heart
her spirit
her will
and not her mind
that was required.
And she realized
that God needs no one’s prayers
but
other people need hers.
Good, the King said.
Seren, the King said,
will you be My knight?
will you fight for Me?
Yes, she said. Yes, anything for You.
Good, He said.
Your sword is a scythe,
Your harvest, the world.
Go.
And so purpose is set anew.
Because God does not delight
In the strength of horses
But in all
Who call upon His mercies.
Amen.Seren Wild © December 3rd, 2017.
Aha! The Lord had revealed through many poems you will be a sword, then the forging process, and finally here He reveals the purpose of the sword.
This wasn’t fantasy fiction but my real life. Every poem was inspired by spiritual and other kinds of reality.
Everything was learned through experiences I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy.
I have had people want to be as strong as I am. I have to tell them, I cannot in good conscience wish on you the path I took here. That would basically be cursing you. I can’t do that.
I weep for what I went through towards the end before I fled my ex lest I die. I have few memories of it, but the little poetry that exists, the pain, horror and damage is obvious.
Then Tucson. I took a long break, began posting again many months into 2018. Had many adventures. Wrote this.
Fire
so on the other side
of darkness
in the land of the sun
where snow never flies
back in the cold place
he who gave himself
to evil
still seeks my ruin and misery
tirelessly working
to cause the maximum harm.
I do not fear him.
But tonight he has snared
a child of the Father
seeking to drag her down
to his father the devil.
I see the angels and demons battle.
My time is short; that plane is coming.
Healing but not all was healed.
But He made us a sword.
A sword, a sword for slaughter
And set us against evil,
And wields us as He wishes.
And I realize: time is short but
time is not up.
He did not excuse us
from the spiritual battles;
they are thicker than ever.
And as our body grows weaker
our spirit grows stronger
burning with Divine fire
not counting the cost.
We are not done.
We have not fought
Our last battle.
Tonight the minion of the Enemy
does the will of his father.
And we will do ours.
And it is on,
and serving the Lord
has never been more important
than now.Seren Wild © September 8th, 2018.
I went into the psych ward for 11 days not long after I wrote this.
So little Seren, what do you think of all this? Please tell Me and the readers what you conclude by all I have just shown you.
My conclusions, Lord, are that You came to me in 2017 and said, you are going to be a sword. Then You in fact made me this sword, and there are real life records of the process.
What I see is I have known for a long time life was short and why that was. I didn’t know when but I knew for literally years life was short.
I wrote quite a bit about it. The records were automatically date stamped on a public site I don’t control; therefore, the dates can be relied on.
I see that tonight I came to You and You unfailingly led me to all this. To Ezekiel 21 when I didn’t consciously know what was in that particular chapter.
And the process of creating this post testifies to the involvement of unearthly forces. There is no logical, rational, scientific explanation for any of this.
Programs are based off code that always behaves the same. Programs do not behave randomly for no reason at all.
So supernatural forces are at work here. This we have proven beyond a shadow of a doubt.
So Who is speaking to me? Running the show? Do we really have any way to know?
Now that we have established You are undeniably real and behind this, can we establish it is really You, the Lord Jesus Christ, Lamb of God, King of kings and Lord of lords, speaking to me now?
He inspired me to dig up the Biblical instructions for testing spirits, which are as follows:
“Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world. By this you know the Spirit of God: every spirit that confesses that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is from God, and every spirit that does not confess Jesus is not from God. This is the spirit of the antichrist, which you heard was coming and now is in the world already.” ~ 1 John 4:1-3, ESV.
I also found this helpful site, and am quoting the following instructions from it. There is a lot more to deliverance in general, and I recommend getting help with that, but this is a decent summary.
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Ask the spirit who his Lord and Master is. The spirit better say his Lord and Master is Jesus Christ. If the spirit cannot confess that Jesus Christ is his Lord and Master – then he is not an angel from God.
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I would then tell her to ask the spirit to confess to her that Jesus Christ has come to our earth in the flesh. If this spirit cannot make this specific confession to her – then this spirit is definitely not from God!
Very good, Seren. The standards I Myself wrote in My Word are clear. I am about to unmistakably prove My identity.
I am Jesus, the First and the Last, the Alpha and the Omega, He Who overcame. I am the King of kings, Lord of lords, Judge of the living and the dead. I am the Lamb of God. I, Jesus Christ, am the Word Incarnate Who came in the flesh. I died for your sins, mankind, to gather you all to Myself. I rose again in a real physical body as the forerunner of all resurrections. I am alive forevermore. I Myself am Everlasting Life, and its only and true Source.
I testify I am behind Seren and her blog and am the operating principle in her life. I testify what she says I have spoken here, I have indeed spoken.
Her words and actions are not perfect; only Mine are. She will fail and fall as she is only human.
Praise You Lord Jesus Christ!! Praise You!!
I think that completely settles EVERYTHING.
I want to additionally note it has been a massive struggle with all tech just to create this post. WordPress misbehaved as well as Deviant Art. My phone misbehaved also. The Enemy doesn’t want this out there!!
So Will I (Music Video)
Is Seren Really Going To Die, Lord?
Heavenly Father, as I have prayed previously, I ask before the world only Your Word and truth be proclaimed in this post. Only Your will be done and no one else’s. I humbly ask this in Jesus’ Name, Amen.
So I am writing because I went before the Lord and said, am I really dying?
It is a good question. I factually have several very serious medical conditions. There are different approaches to forecasting the results of those. But regardless of what man determines, the Lord trumps all.
He is the Lord of healing. He is the Lord of resurrection. Dead bodies are no problem; He can bring those back to life!
Jesus Christ Has The Keys Of Hell And Death
He also solely determines when life ends, and is involved in every death. In the following quote, the Lord Jesus Christ is speaking to the Apostle John in the Book of Revelation.
“…Do not be afraid; I am the First and the Last. I am He who lives, and was dead, and behold I am alive forevermore. Amen. And I have the keys of Hades and of Death.” ~ Revelation 1:17-18, NKJV.
This quite literally means Jesus Christ has the power over Death and determines who goes to Hell. He does the latter in His role as judge over the living and the dead.
Jesus Christ Is Life And The Source Of All Life
This is the real point of my post and what the Lord showed me. He took me to Psalm 31 and asked me to write about it.
But before He would give me a single word, He made me accept that I am dying.
The medical conditions I have are very very real and very serious.
Regardless, He could cure them if He wished. Resurrection also isn’t an issue for Him or entirely remaking bodies from dried up, useless bones (Ezekiel 37).
He can seriously do anything He wishes; He is the Lord. No situation is too far gone for the most part, and the exceptions to this are clearly spelled out in His Word (blasphemy of the Holy Spirit and taking the mark of the Beast come immediately to mind).
Jesus Can Raise The Dead
I want to emphasize the condition of a body is no obstacle to the Lord, as demonstrated by the story of the resurrection of Lazarus. (John 11).
Basically, the Lord found out His friend Lazarus was sick. He hung out where He was for two extra days after He received the news, then journeyed to Lazarus’ house. This took awhile, and by the time He got there Lazarus had been dead four days.
The body was juicy, y’all. It was not hygienically stored in a fridge; it was lying in a cave. It had therefore been rotting for a bit, and Martha, in particular, objected that “Lord, by this time there will be a stench, for he has been dead four days.” (John 11:39).
That was the point, honestly. Jesus stayed where He was two extra days so Lazarus WOULD die. Then it took awhile to get to Lazarus’ house, as He was a decent distance (roughly 20 miles) away, so more time passed. This is so the body had time to decompose. Why? To prove a point!!
Jesus had already given the answer to the pop quiz that was the resurrection of Lazarus. He is good like that; He wants us to have the answers so we can pass the tests He gives.
Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life; he who believes in Me will live even if he dies, and everyone who lives and believes in Me will never die. Do you believe this?” ~ John 11:25-26, NASB.
And then Jesus proved this was true by raising Lazarus from the dead!
“Now when He had said these things, He cried with a loud voice, “Lazarus come forth!” And he who had died came out bound hand and foot with graveclothes, and his face was wrapped with a cloth. Jesus said to them, “Loose him, and let him go.” ~ John 11:43-44, NKJV.
The Bible doesn’t say “and the dead body came forth.” Jesus didn’t make a zombie. He raised Lazarus; Lazarus in his own now completely restored body came forth, bound in graveclothes, and just needed to be unbound to go back to living his life!
This little incident led directly to Jesus’ crucifixion and death (John 11:47-53), which we KNOW happened, so yeah, this is all very real! And had some very serious consequences for Jesus, too.
Clearly If Jesus Can Restore Life To A Dead, Rotting Body, He Can Heal My Body!
Clearly. So it just then boils down to: will He?
Medical conditions, however serious, not an obstacle. Actual physical decomposition, not an obstacle. Bones so dry and weathered they’re only good for ART projects, no problem! He can and will do WHATEVER He wants.
Jesus ALONE determines life and death. He IS Life itself; He ALONE has the keys of Death!
I believe He has said to me, no, not this time. For you, Seren, it is time to rest.
And this is the answer no one wants to hear. Including me.
Nothing Bad Will Happen
I just saw an ad on PureFlix for a movie about a young Amish woman who travels to another community and finds love. Dang, I want all that.
I want to see the ocean. I want to eat good meals with loved ones. I want to travel.
I want to sit on the beach in the Bahamas and let the sun warm my skin, and blog about it.
Life is precious; I want more of it. I could do so much. I am not ready for it to be over.
Judging on reactions I am getting, nobody is.
How this is actually going down is, I get up daily and talk about this stuff. Then talk to my beloved friends, my brothers and sisters and Christ. Everyone is carrying on exactly as if nothing unusual is happening.
Maybe if we all pretend hard enough everything is fine, nothing bad will happen!
Life will unroll day after precious day, we will all stay in denial and hopefully the Damocles sword will never drop. If we all stick our fingers in our ears and sing fa-la-la the golden days will turn into years and nothing bad will happen.
A couple people thought they got crazy messages from God; you will be healed, everything will be fine! One thought I was gonna go visit him even.
There are more sober skeptics. But the general attitude is we really want you to be wrong. Only my enemies want me dead.
Jesus Gets The Glory Regardless
I think everyone would be super happy if I could honestly report the Lord cured me of all the conditions the hospital reported finding. Or could just report that, against all odds, I continue to survive although my body is horribly broken.
This is NOT what He has led me to believe will happen, however.
Remember, Jesus is Life, the Source of Life, and alone has power over Death. So whatever He says goes. For me. For you. For everyone.
I believe He has decreed eternal rest for me, and this is what responsible servants of His I trust have discerned also.
Why???
I am in the unique position of knowing my death is coming and reporting on stuff as I go. And therefore able to ask and answer questions as to why this is happening, which I am sure more than one person has asked.
The Lord took me to Psalm 31. This jumped out at me.
“Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I am in trouble; my eye wastes away with grief, yes my soul and my body! For my life is spent with grief, and my years with sighing; my strength fails because of my iniquity, and my bones waste away.” ~ Psalm 31:9-10, NKJV.
What this says to me is things like grief and sorrow and emotional suffering spend your life, consume your years, affect your actual body. Your very bones waste away.
Well, have had all that in spades.
I Need To Rest
I am very very very tired. The spirit is willing but the body has HAD it.
The Lord is not the Lord of workaholism; He created the Sabbath so man would be forced to rest one day a week. He is the Lord of Sabbath rest.
He Himself rested after His work of creation (Genesis 2:1-3).
And that is the je ne sais quoi in this situation. I am very very tired and need to rest.
That is really the bottom line. I need to rest. I cannot live this way forever; He literally won’t allow it.
As Far As I Know, I Am Going To Die
My body has said ENOUGH! and is breaking down. Jesus could keep fixing it, but it would probably try to break down more.
I could go for lots of treatment; panic in general, insist on all the care possible for every disease. I have opted to go like this instead. I will honestly likely live longer that way.
So I don’t know how long. I really really don’t. I just know life is short.
Jephthah's Daughter 